Everyone wants to marry a kind, loving, caring and nice person. We cherish our peace of mind and will not want to bring someone into our life to destabilise and make our life miserable.
Thus, in choosing a life partner, we look out for those with qualities that suggest they will make our life better and sweeter. Some individuals go all out looking for a ‘perfect’ mate.
Unfortunately, some of us ignore the red signs (those indicators showing how terrible it will be to marry someone), thinking we have the capacity to change our someone once we are married.
Others have high expectations believing we are getting married to an angel who is flawless and perfect. However, the reality of marriage opens our eyes to the weaknesses of our spouse.
Guess what? Everyone has got some weaknesses and there are no perfect mate.
Those weaknesses can sometimes push us to the brink of emotional and psychological collapse especially when we focus on transforming our spouse to suit our expectations.
However, the power to change another human being is not endowed on us.
Yes! we can challenge our spouse to change if they are flexible and willing to do so but to directly change him/her is beyond us.
Change happens when an individual makes up his/her mind and is committed to doing so. This means that changing yourself to be your best, is the much you can, and it is within your power.
Rather than exerting your energy, time and resources on an area that is beyond our circle of influence (to change your spouse), focus on changing your attitude towards your spouse.
Trust me, that is the best you can do.
The good news is that your positive attitude towards your spouse is your main weapon you have to motivate change in him or her.
By Gospel Amaugo