Soul-tie means a form of ‘soulical’ bonding existing between two individuals.
The concept of soul-tie suggests that a bond is formed when two individuals are involved in sexual intercourse.
It is a form of knitting together of two souls, which could be a positive experience when it is formed within the confines of marriage or a positive relationship between friends.
Soul-tie does not always involve sex as it could exist between a man and a man without any form of immoral action or sexual feelings.
Though the term was not used in the bible, it was implied. For instance:
1) The relationship between David and Jonathan:
“And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.”
1 Samuel 18:1
2) The relationship between Ruth and Naomi.
“But Ruth replied, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if even death separates you and me.” When Naomi realized that Ruth was determined to go with her, she stopped urging her.”
Ruth 1:16-18
In these relationships, there was nothing sexual or immoral about them but they involved a strong soulical bond that is even stronger than that of many blood relationships.
These relationships support the point that soul-bonding could result from vows, commitments and agreement between two individuals.
Thus, you could have a man and a woman who has not engaged in sex but are bonded to each other to the point that separation becomes a challenge.
This is why when intimate relationships break-up even when sex is not part of it, those involved are torn apart. Sometimes, even though they want to move on, they find it hard to do so.
Spirit-filled Christians are not shielded from the impact of such a painful experience.
On the other hand, the bible shows a classical example of soul-tie that was a consequence of sexual misconduct.
Dinah and Shechem
“And Dinah the daughter of Leah, which she bare unto Jacob, went out to see the daughters of the land. And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw her, he took her, and lay with her, and defiled her. And his soul clave unto Dinah the daughter of Jacob, and he loved the damsel, and spake kindly unto the damsel. And Shechem spake unto his father Hamor, saying, Get me this damsel to wife.”
Genesis 34:1-4
Sex does not just involve one’s body but the soul. Sex between two humans is not just a hormonal expression or mere rocking and rolling of two bodies, which is climaxed at organism without any link to their souls.
That is what makes the difference between sex between animals and human beings. What is the soul? Simply put, the soul is a combination of the mind, emotion and the will of a man.
Those who have engaged in sex before will attest to the fact that just thinking about the past sexual encounter with your partner is enough to trigger the desire for another sexual episode.
This kind of process can happen to anyone despite his or her spiritual reality. Why is it so?
The experience is registered on the person’s mind, which can stir one’s emotion, and if not checked could impact on one’s will (the seat of human action).
The question is why should an individual who has experienced a new birth struggle with past illicit sexual experience linked to soul-tie? The reason is that at the new birth, your spirit man was made a new but your past experiences were not deleted from your mind.
Sexual experience creates a pleasure pathway in a person’s brain, which requires a process of mind renewal for change to happen. Romans 12:2.
Do I believe the efficacy of the blood of Jesus in dealing with the consequences of sexual sin such as negative soul-tie?
Yes. Do I believe that the potency of the blood of Jesus does not negate the impact of sexual intercourse in creating a bond between those involved? 100%.
Paul in the bible spoke to Corinthian Christians where some of them were struggling with sexual immorality despite their new birth experience.
“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. I have the right to do anything”—but I will not be mastered by anything.You say, “Food for the stomach and the stomach for food, and God will destroy them both. The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. By his power, God raised the Lord from the dead, and he will raise us also. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in the body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit. Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.
1 Corinthians 6:12-18
The concept of ‘one flesh’ used in this scripture in reference to when a man joins himself with a prostitute, is the same as used in Genesis 2:24 and Matthew 19:5
“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.”
This kind of bonding can make a family man run away from his wife and lovely children to live with another woman who gave him a pleasurable sexual experience. Let’s not discount the consequences of our actions on the altar of grace.
On the contrary, soul-tie can be taken to the extreme if it suggests that once an individual (Christian) engages in sex outside marriage, he or she is powerless to say NO if tempted again or that one’s soul is divided into several parts depending on how many sexual partners he or she has/had; to be free, he or she must engage in several deliverance sessions.
Freedom from illicit sex is down to knowledge; understanding your position in Christ and the benefits of the finished work on the cross. Metamorphosis in terms of sexual attitude and behaviour depends on how renewed your mind is.